Match Report: Fidra Lions 1st XI vs Stirling University 1st XI
Location: Stirling University Sports Centre, Division 1
Weather: A beautiful overcast day with the Wallace Monument standing proud in the backdrop

The Fidra Lions 1st XI journeyed to Stirling University with high hopes and low expectations (mostly about their stamina). Under a sky that couldn't decide if it wanted to look moody or burst out in blue skies, the Lions took to the field against the Stirling University 1st XI—whose fitness levels were, let's be honest, quite intimidating. After all, students tend to have more energy than a team who spent the morning debating over who remembered to pack their hockey shoes!!

From the whistle, Fidra maintained possession with the kind of finesse you'd expect after years of practising "keep away" from their local seagulls. Their passing was crisp and quick, leaving Stirling University chasing shadows for much of the first quarter. However, like the Wi-Fi signal in a crowded lecture hall, Fidra’s composure dropped at times, giving the ball away and putting themselves under some pressure. But they recovered well and held their ground.

The first quarter passed without any major incidents, but going into the second quarter, Fidra upped the tempo. A particularly beautiful passage of play saw the Lions break down the left, with the ball pinged into Cammy, who, with more calm than a professor in an empty lecture theatre, controlled a bouncing pass with aplomb, stopping it dead and then calmly sliding it past the advancing keeper to open the scoring. 1-0 to Fidra.

Stirling, despite their youth, speed, and ability to function on minimal sleep, couldn't find a way through the Lions' defence, as the likes of John Ellis and Rohan Wright stood tall, denying them any real chances. As the half-time whistle blew, Fidra were holding onto their slender lead, but their thirst for more was only quenched by half-time oranges(if only).

The third quarter started much the same, but Stirling Uni began to lose their patience—probably because they realized they were being outwitted by a team whose average age included players with mortgages. Stirling's frustration boiled over, with one of their players receiving a green card for pushing Dougie Meikle just before half-time. A few minutes later, back at full strength, Stirling huffed and puffed, but Fidra blew the students’ house of cards down with their fluid passing.

And then came the moment every young player dreams of. Andy Comrie, channelling his inner Lionel Messi, drove down the right, cut into the baseline and flicked a perfect pass to Jonah Pegg, who simply couldn't miss. Jonah slotted the ball into the net to make it 2-0, officially opening his scoring account for the Lions' 1st XI, and immediately securing his status as a future pub quiz answer.

Stirling’s fitness might have given them an edge on the running front, but their shots on target were as rare as a student handing in an assignment early. Two genuine efforts found their way to Matt in goal, who made short work of both, especially a short corner routine that fell apart faster than a group project.

Late in the fourth quarter, just as Stirling was thinking about post-match pints, Gary Wright found himself with space inside the D and rifled the ball into the back of the net. Unfortunately, the umpire ruled it out, claiming the shot came from outside the D—a decision that had the Lions’ players muttering things unfit for print. No matter, Fidra saw out the game with composure and secured a well-earned 2-0 victory.

Final Score: Fidra Lions 2, Stirling University 0
A result that will be talked about for years—mainly by the Lions, probably down at the pub.